That time we replaced a perfectly functional microwave

This post has nothing to do with crafts, celebrating life through photos, or anything warm and fuzzy, and everything to do with the "you cant make this stuff up" moments of first time homeowners.

We've lived in the house with the big orange door for just over 2 years and we've had no shortage of "duh" moments when it comes to homeownership. From doing and re-doing laundry room pedestals, scraping popcorn paint in the garage, and learning the joys of cleaning gutters, this simple doozie takes the cake.

This little story is called: That time we replaced a perfectly functional microwave.

>Enter Wife, stage right, as she prepares to make a delicious bag of microwave popcorn. Upon hitting the popcorn button to start the microwave, a loud pop and the microwave is dead. Wife is sad. Wife loves popcorn for dinner. Wife starts over-reacting about having to spend money on a new microwave.
Wife gets hungry and makes something else for dinner, but it's not as good as popcorn.

>Act II starts 2 months later, where home-cooked meals have abounded, and above the stove sits a completely nonfunctional, powerless microwave.

Yes, Husband and Wife have been lazy. They just haven't had time to go look for a new microwave. Husband and Wife trick themselves into believing they meant to wait this long, that they have accomplished something in breaking their dependency on this radiation-emitting machine. Finally, Husband has had enough. How will he live another day without warming up his frozen breakfast burritos that Wife so lovingly makes. Husband and Wife visit local Best Buy to make the most anti-climatic purchase they've ever made in their short, married life. Husband and Wife return home with exact same microwave, 237.00 poorer. New microwave sits in Garage for 2 weeks. Upon realizing that she is hosting a baby shower in 48 hours where one of the snacks is supposed to be 6 bags worth of microwave popcorn, Wife decides that it's time.

Husband and Wife think: "This will be easy. It's the same microwave, all the holes and bracket are in the exact same spot, we'll just be swapping them out."

Husband and Wife get old microwave down.

----and realize that although these are identical microwaves, the brackets and holes are completely different.

>desperation ensues as Husband and Wife test their marriage in a war of: "who can figure out this worthless diagram" and "who can suck the least at measuring things". After 2 hours, they give up.

Wife hosts baby shower with an empty hole where microwave goes, above stove.

Later that night, friend of Husband's comes over to help save the day, having installed many a microwave himself.

>Scene: It is 9pm and new microwave is up. Old brackets have been ripped out of walls, new ones installed, new holes drilled in cupboard bases and old ones filled, all while Wife observes from a distance. Husband realizes upon friend walking out the door to leave that microwave is not lighting up. Husband panics and doesn't want to alarm wife. Husband scratches head and goes to the garage to have a look around. Husband notices a breaker....that has been tripped.....for 2 months. 

>End Scene<


Yes, my friends, we went 2 months without a microwave, purchased a new one, fought like bears trying to get it installed, gave up, hosted microwave-less parties, and finally cried "help" to our friend to come help us install a new one, all to find out that our old microwave worked all along...

How did we cope? I made a bag of microwave popcorn.

Anyone need a new microwave?